it surprised me to know that my then roommate had broken off with his girlfriend. break-ups are rather typical and ultimately inevitable in a relationship but his relationship was admirable in some ways. they had been shackled to each other for almost six years before they called it off. they were so close at the gates of nuptial hysteria that every time he comes over the boarding house i would ask him wryly if he had already broken the water, if you know what i mean. year after year, and time after time, he replied that marriage is out of his agenda in his life at the moment. yeah, i believed him. what was very special about him or in less gayish tone, the dude was incredibly awesome. when he was still here staying, everybody had been porning a little less, smoked and drank more infrequently and only at significant times. he never had a stash of porn collection, you would say that he never did porn. and in that case, as we conclude, he doesn’t wank either not that not wanking and porning are the ultimate basis of a good man. it just takes a tremendous amount of effort to abstain from them. he does not talk boisterously, never heard his voice rumble through the dorm room as the tenor next room would in the early mornings. it is his implicit mantra to never cause any amount of trouble to anyone. our landlady would speak of good things about past dormers but everybody knows, because his is a legend, that his attitude is the gold-standard of manliness. but there was only one thing that bothers us, dormers, for an amazing guy like him he got himself a beautiful girlfriend. the day he brought her into our premises, the badass in us peered through the dorm balcony and telepathically threw the teleological question, ‘but why?’. she was big, and has rather forgetful face. not that it is my business to condemn people based on looks but you have to see her in a larger context that was him. all we thought was for a man like him he deserves more but you know love moves in mysterious ways and so whatever got them to it, we’ll leave it to the gods to ponder upon. the couple defies every logic that we come up during drinking assemblies: men has and always will run after a lovely looking lad every time. it could happen that the man is uglier than a woman but a woman uglier than the man is disconcerting for nature. that is why, as one of us puts this theories at hand, i always bring up the trump of all exceptions to that hypothesis. look at him and the girl. and we would have this in-denial expression in our face. we would leave it as a magnificent exception and then moved on. but deep in our heart it bugs us really. and so when i heard that they broke up. i wanted to know why. get this: the girl had an affair while she was out in europe. the girl. the girl. at last a break-up that almost sounded like a happily-ever-after, move on to greener, lovelier pastures roommate.

this christmas break, i am reading a novel, out of boredom. and here i am blogging when i am supposed to do more important things such as thesis work. but is thesis work really that important. anyway, i’m reading milan kundera’s unbearable lightness of being, tucked in between thesis notebooks and a semester’s worth of scratch paper. i started reading it at the start of the semester but left it halfway. today, i came across it, and halfheartedly resolved to finishing it. i hope this time i get to the last page.

some quote on the book i want to write down and remember sometime:

“we can never know what to want, because, living only one life, we neither compare it with our previous lives nor perfect it in our lives to come.”

“what happens but once, says the german adage, might as well not have happened at all. if we have only one life to live, we might as well not have lived at all.”